winter quarter in 1500 words

Actually, I don't know how long this will end up being. But here's a summary of things that have been on my mind and what I've been learning this quarter.

Learning

I've been thinking a lot about learning. I don't want to just get good grades. Ultimately, good grades are easy to get. I actually want to learn, to challenge myself even if my classes aren't always challenging me. I want to take my learning seriously, and set aside the time I need to learn about things properly. I want to learn about people, too, and not just let myself be content with shallow relationships and shallow interactions.

Memory

I've been thinking a lot about memory and the importance of remembering. The Brothers Karamazov talks about memory as a form of salvation, and this is something I've seen in my life and in other peoples lives as well. Memory saves because we use memory to remember what is true and what we have experienced. People continue to believe in God as they remember what he's done in their lives. That is a lot of the purpose of the Bible, I think, remembering what God has done. On a similar note, I was talking with a friend about memory the other night, and he was talking about the importance of remembering things rightly. Memory isn't always correct, it can be very distorting and tricky, and it's important to remember things correctly. Sometimes that is the difference between salvation and damnation.

Self-Knowledge

Some of this is just from reading Freud, but I've been seeing the importance of knowing yourself and being honest with yourself about where you are at. Identifying the truth about yourself, as unpleasant as it may be, allows you to move from a better position than if you refuse to acknowledge the truth. Acknowleding that something is true does not mean that it's right, and that's where I think a lot of people go wrong. Saying that I want to be cruel, or that I lust, or that I steal...none of this means that these things are right. But sometimes by being honest, we actually, finally come to believe that something is wrong and are able to change. That is what I have experienced in my life.

Suffering

I was thinking a lot last quarter about how everyone around me is suffering, and I've continued to think about that. My roommate was just talking to me and a friend about how that's been on his mind as well. He's been thinking about how everyone has reasons for why they're douche bags. That's putting words in his mouth, but it basically comes down to the idea that people aren't mean or annoying just because, there are reasons for what people do, and it often comes down to peoples past, and the ways they have suffered that no one else may know about. I want to continue to be sensitive to the fact that everyone is always dealing with different forms of suffering, no matter where they are at in life.

Whatever, that's enough to learn for one quarter.